Boundaries

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This post has been edited and republished on my personal blog here.

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I live a pretty positive/happy lifestyle. I put a lot of effort into staying physically healthy and mentally sound. I had to fight like hell to end up  where I am and now that I’m here and happy I’m going to keep fighting like hell to stay that way. I have put a lot into my marriage and that’s how I get so much out of it. I feel the same way with every aspect of my life. I put a lot into everything that I do in life and, in turn, I get a lot out of life. I feel healthy, because I take care of my body. I can easily chase after my kids and keep up with my kids because I exercise. I have a strong relationship with my children because I spend time with them focusing on the right things.

There are some people, though, that just… don’t. Yet, they expect things in return. And, instead of being happy for you when things in your life work out, they want to take those things from other people instead of working for them. Those people are poisonous. I do not allow them in my life. But, the thing is, you can’t just tell those people “no” and expect them to go away. You have to set your boundaries and you have to stick to them. It might be annoying, but it’s worth it.

When you are happy, and I know this sucks, people are going to try to tear you down. They just will, because they are unhappy. But I’m going to refer back to an older post when I say IT ISN’T ABOUT YOU. It just isn’t. And you have to believe that. When people criticize you for not doing enough, not being enough, they are using you as a mirror for how they feel about themselves.

You can take a stand against poisonous people, too! But you can’t just ignore them. You have to actively push them away, keep reaffirming your boundaries, keep telling them “no”. Yell, if you have to! “No! You don’t belong here! You won’t be in my life!” Then you can ignore them.

You do this with negative thoughts as well. When anything negative comes to mind, replace it with kittens. Or, you know, anything that makes you happy. If you become tired, go for a walk. Are you thinking, “I can’t go for a walk when I’m tired!” Yes, you can. If you feel yourself sinking into sadness grab some Crayola and draw some flowers or rays of sunshine or puppies! Because…

THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH BEING HAPPY.

There is nothing wrong with being yourself, trying new things or dancing when you want to. Because, you know what? Life is wonderful. There are beautiful things in the world that no amount of hatred will ever be able to take away. No amount of bitterness from someone else should effect your smile or the way you live your life. You are worth happiness. You are worth fabulousness. (Don’t tell me “fabulousness” isn’t a word computer!) You are worth glitter and sparkle and rainbows.

And when you’re happy and you have rid your life of these awful people, new people will come. Seriously, new people will flock to you. Happy people who also want you to be happy. Surround yourself with those people, because you will feed off of each other’s happiness. Not only will you share happiness, but you will also share creativity and ideas. And it will feel wonderful. And it will bleed over into all other aspects of your life.

Like it has mine.

I’ve completely strayed from my point about ridding your life of poisonous people, because I was so distracted about all of the good things that come after. But I guess that’s kind of the point, huh? Haha. I guess I do practice what I preach!

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